So far, we're in the last month of this year. My home is a frenzy right now, you know, it seems like "Father Christmas" just threw up over my house, hundreds of dollars invested by my mother in her christmas things, it's so damn odd.
While I look at those things I promise myself not to have so much christmas things if I ever have a home. To me it doesn't have sense at all, 'cause it just stays out of the boxes 2 months only, in fact I find it hilarious. But anyway, we people have our ways to do things, spend money, and all sorts.
Anyway, that's not what I'm gonna write 'bout in this post. It's more towards something I've been thinking lately, on my way to college while I go to lift some weights.
I wonder how many times, we just stop for a minute, and be really, honestly thankfull for what we have.
In my personal experience, and up to the day I thought 'bout the being thankful thing, I barely thought 'bout those kind of things. Most of the time, my mind is like some sort of weird cloud, with thousands of ideas moving over and over... with tons of "Why?" "What if" and so on, not to mention images of people I've met, people who I've talked to, people who made me felt something, people that is gone now, etc.
Guess it's too hard to think 'bout being thankful when you're sort of a troubled soul... the most common thought is "Why should I say thanks?" you know, I know how it feels to have a clouded mind most of the time, feeling a shortage of words, and feeling like not talking to no one, even to your own family and friends.
You just want to stay away... I do know the feeling too.
Taking back what I've said before, while I wrote 'bout my first month lifting weights, when you face such things like weights, your mind set starts to change. And, I'm no exception of the rule. I dare to say that I've become somehow, way more introspective, but at the same time, and recently, I started to realise that most of my mindset about some things was (and still is) completely wrong.
Yes, I repeat, it was wrong. I was wrong... and maybe I'll continue doing things the wrong way 'cause I'm human, but that's not the point here.
Why the "Being Thankful" think started to grow in my mind?
One day I was sittin' on my brand new laptop (My older sis gave it to me as a Birthday gift), and she told me 'bout some message one of my cousins had as his personal message on Messenger. My mother, who was 'round, heard it and, out of the blue she said to my sister "Tell him that he's not alone, God is with Him".
Somehow I choked in a big loud laugh. I'm not an atheist, but I'm not too much religious either. The reaction of my mother was complete anger... Well, I do understand and I don't blame her... I sort of offended her, 'cause technically, I was laughin' at her and her thoughts of God, love, whatsover...
So anyway, as usual in me while I do somehow screw things up, I started dwelling on the idea my mom presented to my sister. And it led me to this idea... "Be thankful for what you've got, even if it's nothing"
I'd not say it was a "Revelation". I'd rather say that, it was like something new being set on my mind... And somehow, I felt some relief. After that, another thought came up, "Don't plan anymore, and you'll be less frustrated". That's two, two things being set on my mind...
The next morning, on my way to the gym, 6 AM, I thought:
"Dear God, whoever and wherever you are, thanks for what I've got. My family, my friends, for what I've have, for what I have not, for what I've been granted and for what I've been denied."
Somehow, I feel quite lighter than I used to...
