The end of the road...

Today, April 23, year 2010...

I oficially could say I'm outta college.

My thesis work is oficially accepted by the college scholars, so I f'cking did it...

No more money to waste, no more time spent on doing something I partially hate...

So,

Yeah I should be happy but, thousands of questions come up to my head... Being the first one "What the fuck am I gonna do now?", being the first and rational and inmediate almost robotic answer: "Continue in the path for being a musician, to keep following the impossible dream".

As the clock keeps ticking, I realise I'm getting older. I've let some very important things go through my life without any fanfare, and I've realised now that it was a big failure. Sometimes I do feel like a failure, and I try to keep this feelings to myself because, I don't want to bother no one else than me, and I don't want to feel no one's pity on my psyched situation.

I'm the worst enemy of my own self...

But anyway, I guess I should be happy. I actually am, since I'd not step into college that much, I'd be able to just, sit down and play that guitar some more, 'till I find some weird chord construction and make it talk.

Yeah, I've seen my future somehow...

Sitting on a room, like the ol' Robert Leroy Johnson, facing my guitar against the wall and playing some tunes... all on my own, no one around. It's hard being a dreamer sometimes, people gets tired of you quite easily, I don't blame 'em, I blame myself for being such a dreamer and an inocent bystander.


And if I'm good enough, I'll be playing around the world, with my band.

But would the dream overwhelm them fellas in my band? I hope not...

I hope they have the guts this needs. Being a musician is no easy task. It is only for the brave.

At least, the kind of musician I aspire and dream to be...

I already have abandoned myself into the unknown, I got sick of all the stability and the rules, of all what is morally correct and incorrect. I'm dwelving into the unknown, and I hope I keep going this way, because life's very short...

Music and solitude, my hard won allies. Faithful, and Patient.